Sunday's on its way

In our 'Freedom in Christ' course last week, we learnt that the healthy way to deal with our emotions is not to suppress them, or explode in emotional 'splurges' on other people, but to honestly acknowledge how we feel. So here goes:

I am a feeling a teensy-weensy bit sad today.

This is fairly unusual for me, as I tend to be more of a 'suppressor' - a habit learnt in adolescence to cope with life, I guess. We have done fairly well in not wallowing so far - we could have had an endless succession of "This is the last time that..."s, but we decided this probably wasn't very productive.

But there's something about the last time sleeping in your own house. [Sorry!]

Onward and upward. I know that God 'gives and takes away', and that the 'glory of the former thing will be surpassed by what is to come', but sometimes it's good to reflect on how good what God has given us has been. This was the perfect house for us at the perfect time, and we are really thankful for it. We have lots of good memories, despite all the hard times.

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It occurs to me that it's somehow appropriate to be having these feelings on Good Friday. But as the song says - Sunday's on its way...

Flattened and packed (mostly)

Why is it that little children wake up and bling! that's it they're ready for the day to start, whatever time it is. They have absolutely no concept of the fact that you do not share their joy at the start of the new day and are not keen to leap out of bed and watch mindless children's TV. 6:20am and my older two were up and raring to go. They got up, flattened their beds (their term for making their beds) folded their pyjamas and got dressed. It's like being in a military academy. I haven't taught them to do this, it's just something they decided to do. They're already planning their day and I, after two cups of coffee, am still not even vaguely human!!


Well, the packing is almost done. Well, at least all the cupboards are empty. All the stuff is in the dining room in towers of boxes, beautifully packed and categorised and labelled etc. etc. by Daniel. Those of you who know him well will know what I mean. The week has been fairly stressful. On more than a number of occasions I have been tempted to pack the children too!! They are not the most helpful packing companions as they gleefully unpack boxes I have carefully packed in the search for new and interesting things to play with.

The plan is to pack a van full of stuff on Tuesday and then drive it to the container in Southampton on Wednesday. That gives us a couple of days to camp in our house and clean before we finally leave Watford on Friday.

School reports

Only two weeks to go now until we leave Watford! Not really sure how I feel about that. I am sad to leave friends behind, but also really excited to be embarking on the next phase of our lives. Nothing particularly exciting to report this week. We have been madly packing, (as much as you can with three little helpers!!!) Joshua and Bethany aren't too bad, it's just Caleb who makes packing extremely difficult. How could I forget so quickly how difficult babies are!!



Joshua and Bethany both finished school this week. Shame really as Joshua has only just learnt the name of the school he goes to. They both had very nice reports, I know they're only little but I was very proud all the same. I quote.."Joshua is a gentle, kind and thoughtful boy who always behaves appropriately and is considerate towards others" I'm not sure Bethany would agree with this, but it's nice to know he can be good when he wants to. It goes on to say "Joshua is a delightful boy; his quiet, gentle manner has helped him to make a very positive contribution to our nursery and will be very much missed". It's just nice that Joshua's first experience of school was such as positive happy one. Bethany's report was equally encouraging. "Bethany is a kind, happy little girl and a popular member of the group...she has a very sensitive side and shows empathy and kindness to others...Bethany has a great sense of fun and makes us laugh on a daily basis" Interestingly as I type this my delightful children are fighting and no doubt hitting and biting each other! Never, mind at least I know they can be kind and sensitive and thoughtful, sometimes!!!!!

Change & loss

Have been thinking about these this morning.

It appears to me that, generally, stress and grief can be considered 'weak' emotions. i.e. only experienced by weak people or 'bad' Christians. But surely stress is, by definition, the inevitable result of a stress-ful situation. And as I understand it, selling your house; leaving your job; starting a new job; moving to another country, climate and culture, and leaving your family behind all count as classic stressful situations.

So, I shouldn't be surprised if we're feeling a bit stressed.

I also realise that in some senses, its going to be harder on our family and close friends than on us. It's always easier to be the leaver than the left. The lack of our presence mirrors death, and grief is the inevitable result of loss.

So here goes for my list of approaches to stress and grief:

• Recognise it: like with many problems, this is often key, and often missed. Tired, irritable, feeling ill, weepy, unable to select one task from many? Once you realise the cause, you can move on.
• Realise it: you are not alone. God gives us tasks and lets us get into situations, but He never expects us to deal with them alone. As created people, we were never meant to deal with life independently of the Creator. If you realise that the 'weight of the world' is on God's shoulders not yours, it helps a great deal.
• Release it:
  
• Share it: there is a lot of truth in 'a problem shared is a problem halved'. Talk to someone else about how you feel, often they have a much better perspective than you, and even if not, it's comforting [see picture].
• Address it: There are ways to cope with stress and grief - cry, take a break, listen to music, have a quiet time - everyone can tackle it in different ways.
• Give it: pray. Actively go to God and tell Him how you feel, and ask for the resources to be able to deal with the situation. They are all there, we just have to realise we need them.

So there you go.

I feel much better now.

[I promise I won't preach every time!]

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So, if you feel like praying for us - that we would approach our stresses and griefs positively; that our family would also, and that we would recognise the signs in our children and deal with them appropriately.

I'm particularly bad at doing this - I can never separate the naughty from the reasons. Pray that I will see beyond the behaviour, and accept the fact that even if (or because) they don't fully understand what's going on, everything is changing for them too, and they are much less able to process the emotions that result.